What do we really need to thrive?
Of course we start with safety, nourishment, security.
We add comfort, pleasure, connection.
We pursue purpose, meaning, fulfillment.
What about challenge, intrigue, complexity, and even suffering?
Both inadvertent (happening to us) and intentional (done by us) difficulties...
Where do those play in?
Are they always bad?
Can we choose some of them?
Take it from a self-care nut: I used to think self-care was ALL about achieving comfort, all the time. And so I'd feel I'd "fall short" when experiencing hardship, trauma, or had to purposely do hard things.
Time has taught me: Just like plants need some challenge from the environment to grow strong, so do we. If we're coddled all the time, we don't grow properly. We also don't fully appreciate the spectrum of human experience on this earth.
Amongst comfort, I've found that adding elements of EUSTRESS, defined as beneficial forms of stress on our system, is a key ingredient to wellness and happiness.
It makes us RESILIENT.
Better able to handle the external stress that comes our way.
And proud of ourselves for doing it.
Since life throws us obstacles hither and thither, we can choose to see how they're making us bolder, braver, more whole and alive. Not victims, but empowered participants who are rolling with the waves.
Disclaimer: if you're experiencing inordinate external stress currently, stick with comfort and ease in the areas that are within your control. Be gentle on your sweet self.
However you can also change your perspective of the stress by asking, "how can this be FOR my benefit?"
So! Take the gardening into your own hands.
Purposely eustress your body and mind -- and kindly comfort them before/after -- because the goal is health, discovery, and joyful growth.
5 Ideas to add eustress to your self care:
Movement practices that push you physically (but are still enjoyable and balanced)
Nutrition upgrades or cleanses that refresh your relationship with food (and nourish you in new ways)
Cold exposure (go barefoot in the garden/lawn/park daily - my favorite thing! Or try cold water, not my jam)
Addressing tough conversations or interactions (intending to bring more harmony and clarity in your relationships)
Taking on new tasks (networking, group singing *nudge* or speaking, adventures, things that seem scary but worthwhile)
& Many more... life is your experiment
If you undertake any of these and want to share the benefits you find...
I'm all ears! I love to talk about the dance of wellness.